United League of American Base B

Chicago Pulls Ahead
Colts Extend Lead To 11.5 Games As Adcock Erupts
CHICAGO (July 31) -- Left fielder Joe Adcock hit five home runs and 11 RBIs in his last five games, leading the Colts as they nearly doubled their West Division lead with a 9-2 run. Tom Sturdivant, last year's revelation and 23-game winner, was 6-0, 1.29 in 6 July starts and is 12-3 since May 7. Second place Los Angeles lost 7 of its last 11 and now finds itself 11.5 games back with two months left in the season.

Cleveland Jumps From Fifth to Second
Steve Barber is 5-1, 1.16 in his last seven starts, including 3-hit and 4-hit shutouts, and was a key factor in Cleveland's recent 14-3 run and jump from fifth to second. Right fielder Roman Mejias has been a key contributor as well, leading the club with 20 RBIs in July. Rookie closer Pete Richert has notched 15 saves while posting a 2.35 ERA in 32 appearances.

Gray Sox Go Old School
Baseball Returns to The Bronx
by Jeff Gurganus
MANHATTAN (July 31) -- Manhattan Gray Sox owner, manager and all round good guy Jeff Gurganus announced today that the reigning Founder's Cup champion Gray Sox will move from the Polo Grounds to Yankee Stadium in 1965. (Yeah, I know, it’s kind of like saying you’re the NIT champion but, hey, it’s all I got.) The move was initiated after Gurganus awoke Sunday morning to find the severed head of former owner Mark Allen on his pillow, with a note attached stating “we are tired of being 12th in home runs allowed every year, you’re next, signed your pitching staff” (just joking Mark – literary license and all that).
   Not wanting a repeat of the Battle of Thermopylae in Manhattan, Gray Sox management deemed it prudent to contact Commissioner Smith about making the move. League officials quickly approved the change but demanded a $10 million payment be made for “stadium improvements” such as “throw pillows and curtains”. Remembering the look on Mark’s pale face, Gurganus approved the transfer, which will be spread over three years, but was overhead saying he believes most of the money will really be used to fund Commissioner Smith’s expensive travel habits.
   When asked to comment on the move Gurganus noted “Yeah, the pitchers probably have a point. The Polo Grounds isn’t the most pitcher-friendly park around. And, I’m pretty sure during the 7th inning of last week’s game Jimmie Hall was banging his girlfriend in center field and nobody could even see him. So it’s probably time for some better dimensions. But I thought the head thing was a bit much”.
   Commissioner Smith had no comment but league sources indicated Yankee Stadium would be outfitted with “very nice things from Pottery Barn, whenever Pottery Barn comes into being” and also noted that "players should refrain from having premarital sex in the field of play during games".